This morning, things were deep and good. Life seemed to have mellowed. Heart was beating at a pace that seemed human and unrushed. The blood in my veins felt cool.
This morning was special because it just made sense. If you give ‘Time’ time, you get your peace prize. No matter what has been eroded away until you get to that spot.
As I grew older & approach the late 20 years of my life. There are few lessons I’ve learnt so far.
EVERY ROSE HAS ITS THORN
Just because someone shares beautiful pics in Instagram and post something nice and funny in Facebook that doesn’t men their life comes with happiness. They have their own struggle and its same for everyone. All that glitters is not gold.
WHAT YOU LIKE TODAY, YOU WILL HATE IT TOMORROW
Things change, life will change too. Don’t be sad for the time and things what you have today. The expensive dress today might be out dated tomorrow. So, invest in time rather than on things.
BEING ALONE IS FINE
You don’t need people around to wipe your tears you can do that yourself. Life is never going to be easy for anyone and you could handle your emotions on your own.
SOCIAL MEDIA IS NOT PERSON DIARY
You have your private life as well. Keep it to yourself and no one cares anyway.
YOU NEED SUGGESTIONS ALWAYS
It’s important to make your own decisions in life. Its not necessary that you need to trust someone, but taking an opinion is okay but more often trust yourself.
SOMETIMES YOU DON’T NEED TO GET AWAY, YOU JUST NEED TO BE SILENT
Some people might hurt you. You don’t need to take revenge. A silent treatment is always better. Remember the silent weapon is the harshest weapon.
DON’T JUDGE PEOPLE TOO SOON
Just because someone is taking time for you, just because they are available for you anytime doesn’t mean they are desperate. The person who cares for you always takes time for you.
NOT ALL GOOD LOOKING PEOPLE ARE ACTUALLY GOOD
Beauty is only skin deep. Not all good looking people are actually good. The person you don’t find good looking perhaps might be a good human being.
LIFE IS NOT ABOUT SATURDAY NIGHT ALWAYS
You don’t have to wait the entire week just for one night to get sloshed. Don’t spend too much time, energy and money for a Saturday or a Sunday night.
AS YOU GROW OLDER, YOUR PARENTS ARE GETTING OLDER TOO
You are an adult right now. Then what about your parents. You at least have your own friends, office & time to get away for peace but what about your parents still doing the same stuff since your birth. You need to break down time for your family as well.
DON’T TRUST PEOPLE JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE HERE RIGHT NOW
There is always something you expect from someone. Just because they are here wiping your tears doesn’t mean they are fair.
INSTEAD OF SAYING YES, LEARN TO SAY NO
Learn to say NO it’s the most needed skill we all need in life.
PEOPLE DON’T CARE
We spend a lot of time among friends. But how many of us will come to rescue when we actually really need them??? Do they even care? They are of course busy with their own life.
LIFE IS NOT LIKE SHOWN IN KARAN JOHAR OR YASH CHOPRA’S MOVIES
Life is never like in movies.
You will eventually get over everything and everyone. So don’t worry.
BEING ALONE IS GOOD
Its not that you don’t make a good company but being yourself is more important. Perhaps you don’t find anyone else way too overwhelming than yourself.
DON’T TAKE NASTY DECISIONS
Relax- you will find a way. But don’t take nasty decisions in life which might cost a life.
Growing up, the one name that was heard the most in our youth in Hyderabad Shopping in Swapna Lok, Secunderabad.
“t shirt mast undi mama, ekkada konav? If someone asks
“Swapna Lok Complex” is 95% peoples answer back in early 2000’s.
Its like a small heaven for a middle class people like me before all the multi branded showrooms taken birth around Hyderabad. Time flew by, I started making more money, but the market is still making good business and the stuff available there still haunts me and my friends. It was like a boon for all our college friends, with limited pocket money we get from parents to buy the best in the market. Even though, cell phones still existed we used to give more importance to fancy clothes and funky brands. We got our jobs, started making more money and financially well settled most of us but once in our lives we still cherish the stuff which we bought from Swapna Lok Complex
Our lives has changes so much, from roaming 20 shops to buy a T Shirt, bargaining from 1000/- to 150/-, from reading a menu form left to ride (I mean first we used to see the price & then order whichever is cheap) to from, picking the top branded T Shirt without any discount to ordering food without even seeing the menu. Our lives has changed, out eating habits has changed, in a way we stopped seeing happiness in small things totally.
Apparently I was a pretty well famous personality in my college days in Swapna Lok Complex building. The USP of the area is that you get to bargain straight from 1000/- to 150/- but still you will be greeted with compliments. The fact is that the clothes also weren’t that expensive too and all the stuff are latest in fashion trends. There is nothing you can find which is outdated even if you want to. Clothes which you won’t even get in a high end show rooms are still available even before their official launch. Sometimes clothes which you buy here last longer than the branded ones. Most of us could afford to be fashionable in college only because of Swapna Lok.
Shopping in Swapna Lok was not just about money but to get to know about latest trends and the experience as well. It a 3 storey building there no single shop has same designs. Ive also seen people in Mercedes come buy things here. Unlike bigger show rooms where you feel embarrassed if you don’t buy anything, you can shop freely here & just do window shopping.
Of course Im always a firm believer of having fun to the fullest extent and making the most of the life.
But is it necessary that we need to take a break from work, projects and family to have fun??? Is it necessary to always connect with friends, get drunk the night away. However as much as I like to spend time outside, I believe spending time for yourself is more important and I feel is more comfortable, enjoyable and entertaining. I mean doing things like, sitting at home, watching favorite movie, listening to songs, gymming, swimming or some kind of activity. How about learning a new language? How about learning a new musical instrument?
As you get older, one should also understand that the time, energy and patience wont comeback again, although you need to admit it will get harder the older you get to do such things. There is no age to gather couple of friends for a drink in a club, but you couldn’t do few things later in life as much as your age, patience & energy supports you now.
Entering a club, to prove that you are happy by ending up paying a huge amount of money? What’s the big deal about anyway?
What happened to that age of hobbies? I only see that in the resume, but how many of you are following? You guys even remember some fancy hobbies like, gardening, collecting stamps, collecting coins, making greeting cards & painting? Where did all this go?
All that we wait is for a weekend, and then get a friend to get out, that’s it??? Too many people is not enough space for yourself. Im totally uninterested about those people and life now.
Why not sit at home? Or your friends home in your favorite pajamas or shorts, or trunks- watching some funny or informative videos. Perhaps a old movie over a nice yummy home cooked dinner?? Why not sing all the songs with your friend in neat volume or try learn the lyrics of a forgotten song.
Because for me, hanging out with my friends means actually hanging out with my friends not drooling out with my friends. I want to share my life stories and listen to them in a sober state. What is the deal with the ‘tanha tanha’ feeling remembering some old memories? It won’t get you anything other than spoiling your mind and peace.
Friends means enjoying the company not enjoying the club. I’d rather hear the strums of guitar playing by my friend rather than sit in a club and get XXX. I want to enjoy simple homemade drinks & life in simpler times than a bunch of useless friends who aren’t useful to any of your life.
After all, I would rather ROFL at a joke than fall down the stairs in a inebriate & intoxicates state.
Random people, selfies for Instagram, few drinks to get into the mood & enjoying a night without any strings attached. And the next day morning, continue your life as usual. This is the new trend right now.
You may call it, ‘Friends with Benefits’/ ‘Casual Relationship’ and for relations without any strings attached I think, everyday day is a good day, and every night is exciting. Its like the bar which has HAPPY HOURS, the coming age relations are also like same ‘happy period’ where you are always happy. You just don’t look for anything else, but maybe end up satisfying each other physically, nothing apart from it. Be it accompanying for a drink, movie or sometimes even sexual pleasure, as they call it BODY NEEDS.
Because like they say, the age of casual relations always give you instant pleasure. Pleasure for time being and satisfaction for that moment. If you say works like, Commitment, Real Relations, Serious Life, Feelings and Emotions, you will be called a FOOL as they are outdated. It’s the new trend and fashion now a days. But surprisingly, the intimacy in relations only reach to a point of bodily pleasure that’s all.
When I was young, or maybe even now, I was always trying to find a true partner for my life where I could spend the rest of the coming years with her. The one who will accept you, listen to you, make you feel good, understand you, and brings the best in you but gimme a break, that’s gone forever now. As Im growing older, I realized, Commitment, Real Bonding, Soul-Touching Intimacy are just the words to be written in blogs and facebook posts but not in real life. But if its shown in movies, you enjoy them blatantly/ like ‘Aashiqui 2’ or maybe the recent ‘Arjun Reddy’, you always wish for partners like them but you cant be one in real life yourself.
All the friendships now a days end up with sex, no emotional connect, no string attached. Be it with multiple people or multiple times, it’s just casual and nothing else. Where are those friends, who actually meet you for a coffee these days, haha, you only meet friends now for drinks—whos interested in thoughts and desires of each other in life, all they are interested is drinks, & casual relations & temporary pleasure. Do the people, actually real find out whats in your mind and heart? Do they actually bring the best in you? Do they encourage you to become successful in life? Do they even suggest whats good and not in life? No ways—all they are interested is your body & not mind and heart.
I was shocked when some people actually, accepted the situations like—they showed in a recent movie- the hero is going through a break up & he seeks help physically from another friend just to overcome the stress and pain. Well, this is what is exactly happening with boys and girls right now. What about the real friends, where did they go?
The age of Tinder, Facebook, Instagram and multiple online dating apps, all everyone is interested is jaw dropping body & those curves and when it comes to ME his FREE TIME and MONEY. Boys go behind beautify & girl behind money & fake people who temporary spend time with them.
I accept bodily needs are very important for everyone and of course it’s fantastic with random people but it would be certainly more exciting when the two people actually know each other & want to be with each other forever.
In a pursuit of finding pleasure, we have chosen wrong paths. Instead of going for a lounge, or a bar or meeting random useless people, we have forgotten to sit by the window & sip a cup of coffee, or watching our favorite TV serial or writing a blog or a reading a book, or spending time family. It’s important that we realize, we are getting older & so as our parents too.
LOVE is not NAKED BODY its NAKED MIND- but I think I cant being the revolution in everyone and I think it too late to change anyones mind right now. People do what they want in life. The generation of social media, & online dating apps- we just look for good time as long as we live in on this earth. Why bother & worry about stupid things like real love, real emotions, real feelings when you don’t find it anywhere. You have plenty of options when you want it temporary but when you want it permanent its boring.
Life is short, make the most of it- aint it??
To Everyone Who Are Reading This—
Friendship is not ONLY about hanging out with someone who don’t come to your rescue on weekdays but only message you to make a plan to go out PARTYING (You know what I mean).
Most of them, you don’t even know them in weekdays, they don’t even remember you, but just when the weekend is arriving, they make WhatsApp group ‘DRINKING SCENE’ and decide where to get drunk. Is that what just friendship is?
Well, I see its happening to most of them these days. Apparently it has turned into new AGE FRIENDSHIP. And this is what most people want as well.
For most of us, it doesn’t matter, who it is, what he does during weekdays, as soon as the weekend arrives—you just get so desperate as if BEST FRIENDS since ages for a meeting at the club or a lounge, dressed to the dime, take selfies, have a good time & Tata Bye Bye until next weekend. The only one word you keep waiting for the weekend is “Lets Catchup” but you only end up catching hangover the next morning.
These set of people, don’t sit to talk, chat or try doing better things in life or helping each other to become successful in life, they aren’t even bothered about other’s work, love and life. They don’t do anything except, DRINK & TAKE SELFIES, act like best friends, pose for Instagram’s Boomerang—This hangover even runs until next day morning with hashtag #LastNightScene.
But why? Is that a sole purpose of ‘catching up’ is booze, loud music and that’s it? Is that what friendship turns for? I think the definition has been changed my many in this generation.
You actually don’t bother to meet a friend, who walks through your day, help you understand life, take care of you personally but you totally only relate to that someone who you would like to party with. It might be philosophical but those are the friendship worth nurturing and cherishing.
Friends, please understand—most of our friends are waste of time. They would only accompany you over the weekend, but they don’t see the ability in your over the weekday, or they don’t even try to give you energy and excitement for life- if someone is standing there, honestly, truthfully then make friendship with them. Not with someone, who you get drunk and escape paying the bill. When was the last time, you actually did a NIGHT IN, then NIGHT OUT with a friend. Or even- just spent a weekend with a friend being sober. There is a saying in English which says “SOBER MEN AND SAGES. ARE BOTH LOST THROUGH THE AGES”- but I think it should be renamed to “SOBER MEN/WOMEN AND SAGES. ARE BOTH LOST THROUGH THE AGES”.
I really tell you people, forget friends who are only more interested in music and alcohol- you should start making friends who truly care, and then life is all the music and dance you want to enjoy.
Lots of things are happening.
Hence I have not been writing. But I think I will write a little more nowadays.
This is a beautiful piece I came across: